my job....part two

I've written a lot about my job. But what I haven't written about is my feelings about my job. About what it means to me to walk into that building each morning at 6:45a.m. About what it means to say "good morning" to kids as I open the door at 7:55 each morning. Today I was coming up from opening the school and ran into 4 or 5 kids eating breakfast sandwiches on the 2nd floor. Our school is on the 4th and 5th. "Mr. XXXXX, we just didn't want to disrespect the school and mess it up." "We'll throw everything out." I smiled. I guess I should have been stern and sent them on their way. But I just nodded and said, "make sure you are at morning assembly." They were surprised they weren't yelled at, and came to me later to tell me the went up and down and made sure the steps (5 floors) were clean. I love my kids. I worry about them. They know my door is always opened. They know I hold them accountable but give them plenty of lifelines. I've talked about leaving this job....but I won't. I get too much satisfaction from it. I know what life would be like without it. So when I enter the building, I embrace it. This is my world.

Torre....and my job...

I've been searching for a metaphor to describe what I do. And I've been kinda stumped. I deal with teachers, parents, students. All who want "just a minute." Then there's the "new" restructing. Filled with ARIS; GAINS reports; Intervention and Inquiry Teams; Attendance Plans: changes in the "Mandated Reporter." Professional Development ranks high. Mentors for new teachers. Building a community. Ending teacher isolation. And the 12 yr. old who was laughing on the way to 2nd period now crying uncontrollably before fourth. That's key. The kids. I simplify my job that way. It goes like this...."kids....teachers.....instruction.....learning.....assessments.....how do we know that kids are learning?" The rest is the rest. I learned early in this job that there's a human element. I don't run a factory. I can't use the business model. I can't say "it's not my problem." Why? Because I work with kids. And adults. People. Both of whom, I believe, want to succeed. So my job becomes how do I get them what they need to get them to that place. A teacher came up to me Friday as we were playing pool after school and said, "Thanks for hiring me three years ago." "I can't see myself working anywhere else." And I said, "you'll never work for another ..........like me." We laughed. We both knew it was true. I have definite ideas on how you build community and empower teachers.
And that's why Torre is the perfect metaphor for my job. Every morning for 12 Years Torre walked in the Yankee clubhouse. The Yankees (NYC D of E) the most storied franchise in baseball. The D of E just won the most prestigious award for educational achievement. He dealt with players (students). The front office (the D of E). The fans (parents). The game itself (test scores). The World Series (Progress Report, Report card). And he never flinched. I admire that. And him.
I was at a mtg. Friday. I came into my building late. My AP did a masterful job handling the day. And as we sat in my office, I asked her, "how was it being me today?" She looked up and smiled. "Not easy," she said.

What I don't care about....

How I'm perceived. People who think they invented the world. Anyone who feels they need to be the center. People who can't embrace the work. People who don't know when to be silent. Anyone who places self above kids. People who fret about "their" room. People who aren't proactive. People who think I'm harsh.Other than that, I'm fine......lol

what do i care about?

Interesting question. I'm often accused of being arrogant. And not caring for people's feelings. Friends...and this is friends....tell me I remind them of "House." Maybe they're right. I am arrogant at times. And I don't care how people take harsh news. I just don't wanna sugarcoat anything anymore. Time is short. I'm flawed.
So what do I care about? My daughters. They are amazing women. Full of heart and questions and strength. I'm different when I'm around them. My school. I started it. I've stayed up late at night thinking, figuring, trying to make it work. Keeping staff focused, realizing everyone looked to me for answers that I wasn't sure I possessed. So I faked it. My sister. She's one of the few who can whisper something and change my mind. My people at school. They are my nucleus. They've worked with me for a few years. They accept that it has to benefit kids. They know sometimes things get choppy. They shout back as infrequently as I shout at them.
If I had to do it again I wouldn't change a thing. Everything in my life has happened for a reason. Either as an opportunity to learn, or an opportunity to grow.It's the journey silly.

some distinctions...

First off, I'm complex. Secondly, I'm flawed. Third, I believe the universe assorts randomly. Fourth, I believe we're all interconnected. Fifth, I like to write. Six, I don't mind sharing what I'm going thru. Seventh, I may upset you. Eight, I don't really care. Ninth, I may or may not get a dog. Ten, I may or may not get involved in another relationship. Did you read #'s one and two? It's a blog people.....lighten up.If you think you know me just from reading this ....lol.....believe me, it goes a lot deeper. But, come join in one man's journey. At least as much as I'm willing to share.

footprints....

I never wanted the job I have. I loved being in the classroom. But I have to say, after 4 yrs. the job is growing on me. I did always want to leave footprints, to let people know I was here. I never knew how I would do it, but I knew I would. I now see that this job will let me do that. There won't ever be anybody else as the first >>>> of this school. That;s me. And that's why its so important to establish the right culture...the right ethic. It's not about ego....but it's also not about being invisible.It has to be about how do the kids benefit. If that becomes the mantra, then that's the footprint I'm ok with.

tats...

I have two tats.....one on my right bicep of the ying-yang, which expresses the duality about things that I've always felt. I've sometimes been plagued by the ability to see more than one side of things. I got that one in '97 when my marriage dissolved after 20 yrs. I added another about a year and a half ago when a relationship I was in went south. It the superman logo on my left forearm. Only to me it's a sign to stay strong. I see it everyday and that's what I think. Stay strong. My kids at school are amazed when they see the supe tat. "mr. ......, do you like superman?" "No," I smile. I'm gonna get a third. That'll be it. I want something to honor my 2 sisters and my daughters. They are the most important women in my life. I don't know what it'll be yet. But sometime soon I'll get it.

Relationships....part....hmmm..

I don't miss joined at the hip, have to see you every minute, why didn't you call me at lunch, you never call me the way you did, I want someone who wants to be with me, relationships. I have a somewhat busy life. School demands time. My daughters, even though they're grown figure in as well. Someone entering a relationship with me would have to accept being third. Sorry....yep. Tis true.And you'd have to get pass my daughters and my dog (and I don't own one yet but am buying soon). For my next relationship I want to work on the Kate Hepburn model. You have your place, I have mine, we get together to laugh, have dinner out, go to family events, hit a movie, talk about our day....but then you go to your place and I go to mine.I truly miss the intimacy...the holding someone deep into the night, the shared glances, the jokes that only we know....I miss all of that. I just wanna be home at my place the next morning.