Vegas

I'm in Las Vegas. Have been for about 9 days. Making my contribution to the "Steve Wynn needs a new hotel" fund. Or as I sometimes refer to it the "why the slots gods don't smile at me" tour. I love it here. When I'm done with my work, I'm gonna be here permanently. Am already planning for that day. Been looking at houses. Trying to remember and learn how streets connect to each other. Yes, it's a billion degrees. Yes, it's strange to eventually put down roots in a transient town. But Vegas is more than the Strip. I get a "feeling" when I'm here. Somehow calmer. Less pressured. The people actually smile and say "thank you" (and not just in the casinos). Everywhere I look I see mountains (duh, I know it's a valley). Vegas has a certain heart that I connect with which is hard for me to reproduce other places. I felt the same thing when I visited Ireland a few years back. I can see myself in Vegas carving out a simple life and thoroughly enjoying what I find here. I like the image.
Was saddened by the passing of Frank McCourt, the Irish writer. Two of his books, Tis and Teacherman are just amazing reads. And Angela's Ashes was a memoir that I just could not get through. Aside from the clarity and tenacity of the writing I just could not handle the description of the unrelenting poverty it contained. And so I stopped reading it. I shouldn't have. I believe you have to -- in ways small or large, your choice -- honor the people and events that have had an impact on your life. And definitely not in a "look at me kind of way." But in ways more subtle. I didn't know -- except through his books and the media -- Frank McCourt. But one of the best experiences I've had is staying in a warm bed on a rainy Saturday morning reading Tis. In memory of that feeling, I think I want to pick up a copy of Angela's Ashes And finish it. Thank you Mr. McCourt.
Got a chance to see one of my daughters this trip. Amazing child and now amazing young woman. It's funny, in my own upbringing, I always felt that I had to satisfy my parents desires/goals for me. It wasn't so much what I wanted for myself, as, I felt, doing what they wanted for me. It took me many years of wrestling with it to get clear of that kind of philosophy. I know what I want for each of my daughters. But being a parent, I think, is helping them achieve/figure out what they want for themselves. Yes, it makes living with some of their decisions difficult. But those are their decisions. I don't know how her decisions will turn out, but they're hers.