The universe may assort randomly but I'm left with random thoughts

I'm advanced relationship work. I'm not easy. I'm complex. I don't fit into nice little boxes. I will infuriate one moment and endear the next. With little rhyme or reason. But I have a plan....always I have a plan. And I may, or may not,let you in on it. See? Infuriating. Why can't I just settle? Accept. Be this geniunely nice guy people tell me I am. I am by the way. Exist in a relationship. Something within me always seems to get in the way. My search. For what? Understanding? The need to test. A need to just not accept. Here's the key.....no one has been able to see this and just flow with it. If someone did I think I'd roll over and let you rub my belly....lol.......I miss my sister. She is so amazing. If she's gonna stay in Vegas I'm gonna have go out there for good eventually....we went through our quality review this week. It went well. I'm proud of my people. They have such heart for kids. And learning. My bottom line for my school is would I let my own kids attend it without rigging their schedule? I would. We have much work to do but with the new classrooms and the dedicated science lab I've been able to get and my staff's growth....we are so close to where I want to be......